here we are now, a sip of wine a sip of water

Someday maybe, maybe someday we'll be smarter?

Is it true, Jimmy? That one day we can be smarter?

Well, who knows, but I know that I won't be able to trust people very easily anymore. Not that I trusted people in the first place, but I continue to let people in my life and they just fucking screw me over. Why are people so fucked up?

Like... people who say they're your friend but then steal shit from your family. What the hell kind of shit is that? Well, it's not qualities I look for in a friend. I was very upset to find this out yesterday.

I lose a friend. Gain a paranoia.

It sucks losing friends like this, left and right. It just lowers the numbers of people I want to hang out with here. And that wasn't a very large number to begin with.

Where are the people who are true and honest and won't let you down? Where are the friends that aren't just in it to stab you in the back? Where have all the cowboys gone? (That's just a joke, duh.)

I hate being so naive. It's not a very positive characteristic if people are just going to keep taking advantage of my kindness.

Addiction, in general, is something that will tear a friendship apart. Any kind of relationship, I'm guessing. Either way, I don't want to put myself in the situation where I'm around people who have a problem with either: drinking, taking prescription medications or any other kind of hardcore drugs. Smoking pot is still a-ok in my book.

Well, on the upside of things... my birthday is in a week and one day. I'm hoping that the ripe old age of 22 will be better than 21. Ah, and I say this every year. Hoping the one coming will be better than the one past. Only time will tell.

"You'd think after 22 years I'd be used to the spin, but it only feels worse when I stay in one place, so I keep walking away." - Conor Oberst, Bright Eyes. I'm just gonna put the song on here, cause this is how I feel right now.

I did download the new Emmylou Harris album, if I haven't mentioned before, and it's pretty amazing. I do love me some Emmylou. Maybe I'll name my first child after her. Just kidding, I already have my children's names chosen, if I get the choice.... lots of things depend there.... haha, if I even have children, for example.

So, imeem doesn't have that song... apparently, so I put a different song at the beginning of the blog. I do love that song as well.

Very lame, I believe. Not having that song at all.

p&l
rachel

i don't know where i am, i don't know where i've been, but i know where i want to go

I'm feeling a new found love of blogging.

I have been pretty absent-minded as of recent, with all sorts of drama going on in my own life. Although it's not as dramatic as a sitcom, it is drama nonetheless.

i.e.: my car transmission. Other things are that our air conditioner is acting all funky. We have to keep sucking a lot of water out of it or else it leaks onto the carpet in the hallway. Very stressful.

Not only that, but I have to unpack all these clothes I put in garbage bags "just in case" that Hurricane Gustav was terrible to our house and whatever. Even though we just got a few downed limbs in the yard.... we still have to re-assemble all the junk in our house we spent so much time putting away.

In other news, I didn't have school today, and that was pretty cool, although that does mean I haven't been to a single Biology class. I don't have them on Friday's, so my first appearance in class will be bright and early Monday morning.

I really love Bright Eyes' albums Cassadaga and I'm Wide Awake it's Morning. Also, I've been listening to the new Emmylou Harris album, All I Intended to Be. I think I'm becoming very folk/early country. Country music is derived from folk music, I believe. From early folk/gypsy music, telling about the life on the land or whatever. I may have to do some research on that.

I don't want to work on this shit in my room. Putting things back where they belong. It's kinda like how my mother said it would be: if we were prepared and got things out of the way of water (if water had gotten in the house) then nothing would happen, and that's kinda how it worked out. But now we just have to put things back the way they used to be.

The surround sound in the living room hasn't been reconnected yet.

I don't know if I mentioned it, but I got a new charger for my computer, so now I don't have to make it all ghetto with duct tape or whatever I had to do before.

Oh, my friend R gave me a really cool ashtray, although I don't smoke. It looks like an Asian pagoda or something. I'm gonna make it all shiny, take a picture and show it off eventually.

p&l
rachel